What We Used To Be
by Reizna
Summary: Heartbreak. Heartache. Can a Hikari heart handle it? Can his Sacred Maiden deal with it as well? Can their son bare the price? Fourshot
1. Past and Reality

A/N: For once, I wanted to write a depressing SatoRisa fanfic. This will be a three-shot with probably short chapters and probably a simple style of writing (since I'm lazy). It may be easier to finish quickly than any of my other fics.

Inspiration: So Sick by Ne-Yo.

**Disclaimer: I do not own D.N.Angel. However, I believe I do own Raito.**

* * *

**What We Used To Be**

* * *

Past and Reality

* * *

It had barely been a month since it happened. That incident bothered him. He cursed his Hikari blood and his reserve. If they never had those, the incident never would have happened.

He would be smiling as he walked into the apartment, leaving his bag on the table in the living room.

He would have been slowly, but surely undoing his tie as he kissed her on the cheek.

Then, he would glance at their child and his smile would be even better.

But no. That was no reality, but only his imagination. He would never see them again.

Hiwatari Satoshi would never see his son or his wife again. This was the reality he didn't want.

He regretted it all.

He should have come home from work to spend time with the family.

He should have been there for his son, Hikari Raito, whereas Satoshi's own birth father had not.

He would have shown them that he had loved them, but he did not.

He cursed his Hikari reserve and hoped his child would not learn it. He hoped it would not be natural for the young boy.

Satoshi hoped his son, in Risa's care, would know nothing of cold and bitterness. He hoped Raito would know of love – something his father could not learn from his mother.

The father also hoped Raito would not grow up to be like him. The boy deserved to be loved while his father would not.

He knew someone would replace him as Raito's step-father. Risa would love another again while Satoshi would not. Sure, there were other women, but in truth, once a Hikari fell in love, they would stay in love with that person whether it hurt them or not.

It was the way things were. It was just another of their curses.

"Another of our curses. I wish Raito won't suffer the same fate." He whispered as he prepared for another sleepless night alone.

That was the way it has been with Satoshi ever since Risa took their son and left him.

He was depressed at home during the night, but as cold as stone ice during the day everywhere else.

He would never let anyone see. No one knew of his depression because of his façade, which was colder than ever. It was as if Harada Risa had never come into his life.

* * *

He wished she was still there with him, but wishes were futile. Satoshi had learned that years ago when his mother, Rio, died.

He had learned once something was lost, he would never get it back. That was the way he had lived life, afraid to gain anything for he knew one day he would lose it.

This indeed happened. Thus, his depression at home and overloading with stuff to do at work kept it out of his mind.

* * *

"I see; you were an officer in the States." Satoshi sat in a café, reading some new recruit's paperwork. This man had a lot of experience. But other than that, the Commander-in-chief began to speed-read through it.

"I never thought the Supreme Commander of Azumano's Police Force was that young." The blond man mumbled. Of course, Satoshi heard him.

"I've held his post since I was fourteen."

"So I've heard." The new recruit replied, "My current girlfriend mentioned something about that."

Satoshi felt an eyebrow rise. So his girlfriend was from Azumano? Coincidence? Nah, he figured most of the people he went to school with moved away and came back.

It just _had_ to be a coincidence.

"Hey, honey." Called a feminine voice.

Satoshi held his breath. It couldn't be. From the papers, he looked up to see the familiar face of his ex-wife. Beside her was their son, Raito – a splitting image of Satoshi himself (blue hair and all). At this, he looked away.

"Hey. Allow me to introduce you to-"

"The Supreme Commander of Azumano's Police Force," She answered for him, "Hiwatari Satoshi-san. It's…nice to see you again."

"Likewise, Harada-san." His voice turned cold as he turned to face them. This was definitely no coincidence. It was then when Risa's new boyfriend spotted Raito staring at Satoshi.

"Raito, it's not polite to stare." The blond man, Chris, scolded.

Raito paid no heed to his warning. The young boy pointed at Satoshi, saying this aloud, "_Otou-san_."

Chris had this look on his face as he managed to translate it into English. Satoshi could have laughed, but he held it back. Damn _gaijin_. Satoshi shook his head. "I don't think your mother would like you calling me that anymore."

"But you are my _Otou-san_. _Okaa-san_ kept telling me that I look like my _otou-san_ and then, she would turn and cr-"

"Hikari Raito, that's enough." Risa snapped. She gave Satoshi a small, uncomfortable smile. "It was nice speaking to you again, Hiwatari-kun."

And there they were, back to honorifics. Just like in Middle School. The blue-haired man nodded. "Hai, Harada-san."

It was nice to hear her voice again, but it did hurt. A contradiction caused by his love of her and the remembrance that she was no longer his.

He watched her go with their child, being followed by the new member of the Azumano Police Force. Satoshi let out a low growl.

Why were the fates tormenting him?

Must another curse be cast against him?

* * *

He let out a sigh as he sat on the edge of his bed. Satoshi remembered everything. The memories he had with Risa would not just go away in a single night. It took so much for a Hikari to forget – he was not going to do that far.

"My beautiful Sacred Maiden," He whispered, "I miss you. I just can't let you see."

If she was happy the way she was, then, he knew to let her be than to chase her again.

Thinking of her, his eyes fell to the ground as he clutched his shoulders. A rush of forgotten magic and a wave of pain surged throughout his body. Memories of his beloved maiden remerged the wings he had loathed.

The wings which represented purity now symbolized his heartache. She would not know his wings came out again. Risa would not. She would never know.

* * *

Satoshi woke in the morning. His low blood pressure was kicking in when he began to wonder if everything was all just a horrible dream. He turned to his right side to find no one there. He let out a long, saddened sigh.

It was all true as much as he didn't want it to be.

Suddenly, he heard the door knock. "Hiwatari-kun! Open the damn door!"

He recognized the voice. It was no other than Harada Risa and her new man, Chris.

"Risa, honey. He's the Supreme Commander!"

"For God's sake, Chris, this man was my ex-husband."

That hit the spot. She didn't even tell him. Annoyed as hell, Satoshi managed to get himself out of bed with a white tee-shirt to cover his upper body. Walking down the hall, he grabbed his glasses before opening the door.

"Harada-san, I thought you of all people knew I have low blood pressure."

Her face went pale. "Where is my son?"

"Raito isn't here with me. You may check my entire apartment if you wish to." The blue haired man replied.

Risa shook her head, cupping her mouth. "No."

There was only one thing left to assume.

Hikari Raito was missing.

"Where is he, Satoshi?"

It was the first time in about a month since he heard anyone speak his given name. It had been the first time she had said it. From the look in her eyes, Satoshi knew she was begging for help.

But where in Azumano would their son go?

* * *

What do you think? Love it? Hate it? Please tell me.

Please read and review.


	2. Do You Trust Me?

Oh, I forgot to make a note in chapter one. If you don't already know, _gaijin_ means 'foreigner' in Japanese. And for JadOo who caught the Death Note name, I hope you noticed the pun as well. Heh heh. XD

For those who have no idea what I'm talking about…Raito is the Japanese way of saying the word Light. Speaking of light, the word for it in Japanese (most of the time) is Hikari. Yeah, I know stupid. XD

* * *

**What We Used To Be**

* * *

Do You Trust Me?

* * *

A month had past. She pretended it never troubled her, but it really did. She cursed her actions and what she had brought about. Then, she cursed his emotionless mask. If those did not contribute to anything, the incident would have never occurred. 

They would have been one big, happy family.

He would be smiling as he came home from work. She would have been in the kitchen, cooking the meals he had taught her.

Their son would be playing with his toys in the living room.

All would have been well. But that was all imaginary.

Harada Risa would never see him again.

That was the reality she regretted creating.

She should have called him to see he was alright at work, asked him to come home.

She should have been there, supporting Satoshi while caring for their son, Raito.

She should have showed him that she loved him whereas his parents never taught him of it.

She hoped Raito would never gain the reserve of the Hikari. He was already the splitting image of his father. She already cried after talking with her son about his father.

She did not need the son to act like her last love.

It would be too much.

Risa hoped Satoshi would learn to never return to his bitterness. She hoped her former husband would love again.

She wished he would, but she did not know one thing.

She never knew that once she was his Sacred Maiden, his maiden she would remain.

* * *

After the incident, she took herself and Raito to America, where she had fell in love again. He was a cop named Christopher. Blond and handsome. He was smart, but not genius smart. 

Raito didn't like him at all, but dealt with him – never questioning anything.

The boy never did until one random day.

"_Okaa-san_, I want to go home to Japan."

With that request, they sped off back to Azumano, Japan. There, it was easy to land Chris a job with the Police Force. But Risa was reluctant to do so, worried for her presence there.

She did not want to see him – that blue haired Hikari.

But she had.

Risa was nervous whereas her ex-husband did not. She did not tell Chris that she knew the 'Commander Hiwatari' until much later.

However, Chris learned another thing. Raito was the Commander's son.

* * *

"Honey, why didn't you tell me that Raito was _his_ son?" Chris demanded. 

Silence was her mere reply as she walked on. So Chris could put two and two together.

"_Okaa-san_ didn't want to scare you." Raito pointed out, mixing his perfect Japanese with his English. That proved it. He was the Supreme Commander's son. He had the intelligent gene in him. Forgot to mention, he's only about five years old.

"_Raito_!" Risa snapped. Memories flashed in her mind.

She could hear the joyful laughter as she recalled everything.

She still remembered the way Sat--Hiwatari-kun caressed her cheek before they kissed; the way they had made love; the way he used to smile at them before leaving for work. So many other things awoke from the depths of her mind.

Risa stood there, caught in her reverie. Her hand was clutching his son's. A single tear streaked down her left cheek.

That was when some of the passerby began to notice her and her son. They knew. Snapping herself out of her reverie, Risa wiped the tear away. "Let's go."

* * *

That night, Risa could not sleep at all. Their hotel room was quiet except from the occasion snore from Chris on the other side of Risa's bed. (No, they did not do it.) She sighed and sat up, revealing her black nightgown. She glanced to the other bed, where Raito slept alone. 

She smiled at his sleeping figure before she heard him groan and mumble things.

"_Okaa-san. Otou-san_. Help me…"

A nightmare? She supposed so and got up, walking to her son's side. "Raito, it's okay." She said softly.

"No, it's not. You don't understand. I need you, _Okaa-san_, _Otou-san_. I need you so he can't come. He feeds on depression, anger and hate. Love fights him. I need-" The little boy was cut off, but he began screaming in his slumber.

Risa was the only one aware. Chris was sleeping on the other bed like a log. Damn his deep sleeping habits.

"_Raito_! What's going on?" She asked.

There were no words from his mouth, only screams. Risa threw the covers off the boy as she watched him curl up into a fetal position.

He was clutching his shoulders, but why?

She didn't understand, but this seemed familiar.

"_Otou-san_! Help me! He says only you can stop him. _Otou-san_!"

He was crying out for his father. Raito was calling for Satoshi, a person who did not know this was happening.

Then, it hit her like a rock. This happened all those years ago to Satoshi. He had warned her that this may happen to their son if he indeed married her.

That was when she caught sight of it. White wings were beginning to emerge from Raito's shoulder blades.

"No…"

"_Otou-san_!"

"_Love him, Risa. Please, love him the way my mother never showed me_." Satoshi's voice echoed in her head. Tears began to swell up in her eyes as she threw her arms around her son.

"Raito, I love you. Please, stop. I love you."

The screams continued. Risa glanced at Chris, who did not awaken. She cried even more. "Raito, your father loves you. Satoshi loves him. Never forget that. Krad, you heard me. Stop infecting my son."

With this, the white wings began to shrink and the boy relaxed. She hoped that it would be the last time.

* * *

She was wrong. 

It happened again, but when she was asleep – dreaming of things that once were.

Risa never knew that Raito awoke with his wings fully emerged. His blue eyes pained – an expression that he shared with his father that night. He left the hotel room without another word.

It was at dawn when they discovered he was missing.

Where did he go?

* * *

"Where is he, Satoshi?" Risa found herself asking. Chris stood behind her as they faced Satoshi's apartment. 

It was once hers and Raito's, as well. That was until the split.

She watched as Satoshi put his hands in his pockets. He stared between his ex-wife and her new man. "Tell me, does Raito consider Christopher as a father yet?"

Risa shook her head. "No, actually. Raito doesn't seem to like any other man."

Chris opened his mouth to say something, but then closed it. This conversation was strictly for Risa and Satoshi. The blond chose to remain out of it.

"I see, so Raito hasn't abandoned his Hikari name."

"It's still on his birth certificate." Risa mumbled, "With all due respect, why is that important?"

Satoshi turned his back on his ex-wife. "Because if he still calls himself a Hikari, Raito may have tapped into a memory embedded in the clan's bloodline. A memory of a place only a Hikari would know."

That meant Satoshi knew where it was as well. "Take me there." Risa blurted out.

"Risa…" Christopher started. She only shot a glare at him.

"I could, Harada-san, but I'm afraid Christopher can't come along. After all, he wasn't the one who married into my family a few years ago."

Goddamn it. She hated it when Satoshi addressed her as 'Harada-san'. She loathed it completely. As did her sister, but that's not important. She put her hands on her hips and narrowed her gaze. "Fine then, Hiwa-"

"It's Satoshi." He merely replied, putting his left hand in his pocket as he walked out of his apartment. The door shut immediately afterward, followed by a sequence of beeps. Risa had forgotten they --- he had a keypad lock instead of a normal keyhole.

Risa glanced at Chris, who looked somewhat hurt. "What is it, Chris?"

The blond looked at her. "Do you trust him?"

"Yes, I do. He is the father of my son. And well…it's a like father, like son thing…" Risa trailed off. Her last statement was partly true.

"Do you still love him?"

Risa was startled. "I-I…I don't know."

"Then, go find out." Christopher muttered coldly. At this, he turned away and headed back to the hotel they were staying at. Risa stared at his fading back before turning to face Satoshi, who had extended his hand.

"Shall we go to Raito?"

She nodded and took his hand. "Hai."

* * *

They walked across town, passing by the Niwa household. The duo did not bother to walk them up. They could handle it on their own. 

Risa blushed at the thought of him leading her somewhere. But it wasn't like that. They were just going to find their son. That was all.

Love would not come between them ever again.

* * *

Satoshi knew what he was doing. He knew what she must have been thinking. 

He would not dare interfere with her love life again. He had already tampered with it once and the result was this: the split and Raito's disappearance. He sighed and her hand slipped from his.

He could not tell her. Satoshi felt that it was unnecessary, but he missed her. He missed the feeling of her in his arms, the talks they used to have and the way they would watch Raito until he fell asleep. So many other things he had missed all involved her.

He felt the empty spot in his heart grow as he was unable to say the words.

_I want you back, but I just can't say it._

* * *

Silence crept between them as Satoshi halted before a forest path. Risa looked up from his feet and her eyes scanned his back. It seemed rigid and she began to question why. 

She watched as Satoshi used his right hand to massage his left shoulder. The ex-wife raised an eyebrow, walking over to him as she began to massage it for him. That was the least she could do.

"It aches?"

"Yeah." He replied, his hand slipping back to his side.

"Why?" Risa asked. She spoke too soon.

A gasp escaped her lips as her hands drifted to his lower shoulder blades. That was where she felt them, the scars. They were in the same place where she had seen the wings on Raito.

"White wings? Did you-?"

"I didn't cause them. I didn't think it would happen to Raito, but it did, I assume?"

Reluctantly, she nodded. It truly was like father, like son. Tears began swell up in her eyes again as she recalled the event that occurred the night before. She buried her face in his back. She felt him relax and wrap his arms around her.

Crying onto his chest, she clutched the front of his white shirt.

"Don't worry. I'll make sure Krad doesn't come out of Raito," He whispered, "Just please do your part as a mother and love him the way my mother never taught me."

She would…if they found Raito where Satoshi thought he'd be.

* * *

All questions will be answered in the next (final) chapter. Bits of fluff here and there so don't worry. 

Okay, enough of that. Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Like it? Hate it? You know the drill.

Please read and review.


	3. Curse of The Hikari

I changed my mind. It's not a three shot anymore. It's a four shot.

* * *

**What We Used To Be**

* * *

Curse of the Hikari

* * *

That night had been the worst one since his parents broke apart. Little Raito knew that much. Because of it, wings of white sprouted from his back, leaving behind scars. A faint trace of a voice echoed in his head. The feeling of being watched never left him since that nightmare. 

His back was aching when he had run (more like glided) though the empty streets of Azumano. His feet knew not where he was going, but his mind seemed to know differently. A memory from a dream? No, it was not. He knew where he was going.

He was a Hikari. Hikari Raito, the son of the last tamer of Krad. Satoshi's blood coursed through his veins.

Of course, Raito's mind knew where he was headed for he had tapped into his blood's memory. It was taking him to a place long forgotten; only remembered by his father.

They would come find him. Together, like he _hoped_.

Hope.

His wish to see them work hand-in-hand would not die as quickly for he took this from his mother.

Hikari Raito was their son – whether they liked it or not. He knew what happened was wrong. The boy knew the split was a horrible mistake. Now, it was his duty to fix their mistake.

But first, he had to flee to the one place in his memory.

There, he learned of many things.

One of them being what really happened between his parents.

* * *

_One month ago…_

_Risa had been waiting at home. She had already tucked Raito in for bed. She glanced at the clock. It was late at night. He should have been home by then. _

_He should have…_

"_Do you think this is a good idea?"_

_Her ears picked up his voice from outside the front door. The brunette rushed to let her husband in, but as she opened the door, she gasped. _

_There, he was._

_He was standing with another woman._

_Satoshi, her husband, was standing out there, holding out a little blue box out for the woman to see._

_Her body went numb when she turned her back and ran to Raito, whom she woke up when she screamed at Satoshi, who was yelling back._

"_I loved you! How could you-?"_

"_Risa, please. Listen to me. It's not like that. She was-"_

"_Hiwatari-kun," Her voice was cold as Satoshi's once was, "In the morning, I will leave this place. You will never see me or my son again."_

"_Risa…" His complexion did not show the pain, but his eyes did. Risa ignored this as her tears poured down her face. She held out her left hand and slipped her wedding ring off. _

"_Goodbye, Hiwatari-kun." She whispered hoarsely as she placed the ring back in his hands. With that, she never spoke another word to him nor slept in the same bed. _

_She was gone at dawn. Everything she owned, she took with her – including her son. All that was left were the old school yearbooks and a few pictures of the couple together. _

_Everything Satoshi had held dear had slipped from his fingers._

_But it was all a misunderstanding._

* * *

"Fuck!" _Satoshi yelled out loud._

_He had taken a few days off work and retreated to his secret hideout – a place only a Hikari could find. It was an old tower located near the old Hikari grounds; it only appeared when one with Hikari blood entered the vicinity. In the past, it had been used as a kind of a vault for the weaker artworks._

_Satoshi had used it as his little base when he needed to stay away from people and his artist workshop. Everything he had created by his hands was stored there. _

_Risa did not know of this place, but he had planned on taking her and Raito there for both the anniversary and Raito's birthday (which coincidently two days apart). However, his plans had fallen apart._

_A misunderstanding._

_Risa had seen him with the living artwork which he had meant to help Risa with caring for Raito and other various tasks around the house. He had pulled out the ring box in preparation for the surprise and then, came the dialogue._

_His ex-wife had misunderstood what was going on. Risa had thought he was cheating on her. _

_He had not. His heart belonged to only her, his Sacred Maiden._

_When he had arrived at the ancient tower, he had placed the blue box at a shrine at the heart of the first floor. The new living art, Shirube, watched with sorrowful eyes as her creator destroyed the stained glass windows on the upper floors. _

_Glass scattered on the floors. Blood dripped from her master's arm. Feelings of anger and guilt resonated throughout the hideout. All art within (save for the ring) were affected. They reacted to the Hikari blood and his feelings. _

_They appeared, saddened and served as a constant reminder – something they could not stop. A statue Satoshi had erected in honor of Risa stood alone and unmoving in the shadows, but from it, her laughter could be heard._

"_Damn it. Shut up for one second." He needed to hear himself think. His reserve had to return. It had to in order for him to survive without her._

* * *

Raito sat in the midst of the artworks. They sprung alive, reacting to his blood. They knew who he was and vise versa. His eyes glanced up at the artwork, _Shirube_, who was tilting her head to the side. She looked like his Uncle Daisuke's maid, Towa – except for the hair was black, not silver. 

"Do you see the truth now?" _Shirube_ asked.

Raito nodded. "Okaa-san is quite the jealous type, ne?"

"Your father said so specifically. That is also why he designed me after the_ Towa no Shirube_…" Her voice trailed off. Of course, they both knew the design did not help any cause. It just led to the divorce.

The young Hikari let out a sigh. Silence fell between the human and the art. Raito's new- found wings were incredibly still, unlike the night before. They weren't itching for flight or anything. Even though they were still, Raito had found it hard to deal with the pain from the wings.

"Raito-sama…"

"It's just Raito."

_Shirube_ laughed. "Just like your father. He hates it when we call him with that honorific."

She stepped down from the shrine in which she sat upon while talking to the youngest Hikari. Her hand brushed on the dusty box as she leaped off. She kneeled before Raito. Her eyes began to give off a strange golden glow.

His wings began to emit the same color aura as _Shirube_'s eyes.

"Speaking of them, they're almost here."

* * *

_Just please do your part as a mother and love him the way my mother never taught me._

Risa pondered on his words as they continued on their way to wherever they were going. On their way, they passed by a mansion. Her eyes widened when she had seen the symbol engraved above the main entrance.

It was a pointed cross – an emblem Satoshi used sometimes to sign his paintings. He had once said it was the Hikari insignia.

"Satoshi, is that-?"

"That was the mansion you three were supposed to live in when all of Satoshi-sama's preparations were done." A feminine voice answered.

Satoshi stared as a female figure stepped out of the bushes. He knew who it was. Risa would never forget her face and gasped.

"_Shirube_, I thought I sealed you."

_Shirube's_ black hair was lifted with the wind. Her green eyes lowered her gaze as she turned around. "Sealed along with the ring you meant to give your Sacred Maiden in that place, but Raito-sama broke the seal with his touch."

"Raito's still there?" Risa asked hopefully.

_Shirube_ nodded. "He has been waiting for the two of you."

With that, the female turned and returned to a place hidden behind the bushes. Risa glanced at Satoshi, who had his arms folded. His icy façade was up again.

"Who is she, Hiwatari-kun?"

"She is a living Hikari artwork I created to help you at home. I created her a month ago…"

* * *

"The incident happened, and here we are." Raito mumbled to himself. 

He did not know that _Shirube_ was on her way back with his parents following. The boy stood and walked over to the shrine and touched the box which held a ring. For a month, it sat there untouched.

"It's sad _Okaa-san_ never knew _Otou-san's_ intentions."

'_Perhaps, it was better that way.' _ A voice echoed in Raito's head. It was the same from the nightmare the night before. It was Krad. Reluctantly, the boy's eyes lifted to the mirror which stood on the shrine itself.

He shook his head violently. The reflection in the mirror was not his, but Krad's. The deceiving amber eyes of hate seemed to be laughing at him. Raito cried out as despair took over him.

He was not like his father. He didn't have that Hikari reserve. Raito had never learned of it. The boy could not do anything to stop the devil in the angel's disguise. "_Okaa-san! Otou-san!_"

He collapsed onto the floor and curled up into a ball. The pain would come in an instant. Raito hoped his help would come shortly afterward.

'_They can't save you now. They're not here_…' There went Krad's mocking voice.

* * *

Shirube gasped. Her green eyes went blank. "White wings is breaking free. We must hurry." 

Risa and Satoshi looked each other and nodded. Shirube rushed into the tower and the duo followed her inside. On the ground floor, they found the shrine and the same blue ring box. Before it, they saw Raito with a blue aura surrounding him.

"NO!" It was Satoshi who had reached the boy first. Raito was now on his back. The growing wings were visible. The boy's father cursed, grabbing the wings.

"You're not getting out through my son, Krad!"

Risa burst into tears as this scene occurred in front of her. Shirube attempted to calm her mistress down, but it was no use. Nothing could stop Raito's mother from crying the way she did.

* * *

Raito had no idea what the hell was going on. The only thing he had control over was his mouth, which cried out for his parents who were already there. His father had grabbed the wings and kept them from emerging further. His mother was watching with Shirube, crying her eyes out. 

'No. Leave me alone, Krad.'

'_No, I'll let them suffer first_.'

Raito shrieked in pain as Krad's power surged throughout his entire body, which was no longer until the boy's command. Krad had caused Raito to reach for a huge glass shard. Satoshi could not see this for he was distracted trying to bind the wings down.

"_Say goodbye to your son_."

* * *

"_Say goodbye to your son_." 

That voice was familiar to Risa's ears. She screamed. Her voice echoed throughout the tower. If it was able to, it would have broken glass. She shook her head.

No, it couldn't be. Krad couldn't come back. Satoshi had promised he would find a way to keep him away from them.

"Raito! No, I love you. Your father loves you. Krad, leave him alone!"

* * *

Satoshi's heart almost stopped. "Raito, stop it. I love you, okay." 

He really did mean it. Though it was rare for him to say something like that, Satoshi did mean what he had said.

But it was not enough to stop what was coming. Raito howled. Before the devil himself faded, Krad caused the glass shard to fall, striking the boy's chest. It began to bleed instantly. The blood flowed, staining the boy's shirt. His eyes darkened and he passed out.

"_RAITO_!" His parents yelled.

"_RAITO-SAMA_!" Shirube called.

There was no reply from the boy. Satoshi immediately picked up his son, knowing that if he removed the shard from his chest, it would only kill him faster. He looked at Risa, who pulled out her cellphone out. All three of them rushed out of the tower and headed for the old Hikari mansion.

As they did, Risa dialed 9-1-1. She hoped they would come in time. She glanced at her son with tears swelling in her eyes. She could not think the worst.

Raito had to survive this. His father had. So, why shouldn't he?

* * *

I feel evil, leaving the rest of you with another cliffhanger. Gomen ne. Now, the next chapter will be the last, I promise. 

Please read and review.


	4. What We Were Supposed To Be

**What We Used To Be**

* * *

What We Were Supposed To Be

* * *

Risa did as Satoshi asked. She had called 9-1-1 while they moved Raito into the main mansion, where they awaited the help they called for. They came in time, but now, they had to rush to the hospital. 

Tears continued to run down her face as she watched Raito be loaded into the ambulance. Risa looked at Satoshi, who was getting his car ready. _Shirube_ was standing beside an open car door, waiting for her mistress to proceed inside. Risa did just that.

The maid artwork sat in the back, as silent as the grave. Satoshi was driving with Risa at his side. They ran a few red lights, but no police would dare give their Commander-in-Chief a ticket for that.

* * *

Satoshi had allowed Risa to call Chris and inform him of everything while they waited outside the Emergency Room. Raito was inside and had been there for over than hour now. They all sat tense and worrying for the boy's wellbeing.

Risa was still crying. Satoshi sat beside her, trying to comfort her. Eventually, he just handed her his handkerchief and let her keep sobbing. She just could not stop. It must have been a mother thing. Her ex-husband was right (_Shirube_ had confirmed it for him).

But it hurt him to see her cry. He loathed the sight of her tears. For the moment, she could not stop them. Their son had a possibility of dying, leaving Satoshi as the last Hikari once again.

* * *

"Risa!" 

They lifted their heads. It was Chris. Satoshi looked away as Risa stood and embraced her boyfriend. That did shoot some pain into the Commander's heart. _Shirube_ sensed this and said nothing about it. The blond police man stole a glance the artwork and lifted an eyebrow.

"The commander's?"

_Shirube_ shook her head. "No, I'm merely a daughter of a maid who once worked for Hiwatari-sama's family. I was supposed to be Raito-sama's babysitter before the whole incident."

Satoshi nodded, agreeing with her story. It was partly based off the truth, after all. The commander-in-chief ran his fingers through his hair and quiet came between the four of them.

* * *

Eventually, the doctors emerged with Raito on a stretcher. Bandages were wrapped all over the young boy's chest. This scene reminded Risa of something that happened long ago. She remembered that Satoshi had been the boy with the hidden bandages. Well, he was one of them. Daisuke was the other. She and her twin later learned why. The reason Satoshi had so many visits was the same as Raito's: Krad. 

"Doctor?"

"He'll live. He just needs rest to recover."

Risa let out a sigh of relief. Shirube smiled. Even Satoshi did smile a little. Everyone did except for Chris, who still had a serious look on his face.

* * *

Satoshi and _Shirube_ sat in Raito's room, watching over him as Risa and Chris left to get some food from the cafeteria. An ominous feeling fell over Risa and she glanced at her boyfriend. Something was up. Why did she only feel it now? She blinked her brown eyes when his met hers. 

"Is something wrong, Risa?"

"I should really be asking you that." Risa replied, "You didn't seem all that happy when they said Raito would live. Why?"

"Let's go." His voice turned cold.

"What? Why?" Risa demanded to know as Chris grabbed her wrist and attempted to drag her away. The woman stood her ground and broke her wrist away from him. She glared at his back.

"I'm not leaving Raito."

"Risa…"

"I'm not leaving my son behind without me." She stated firmly with her feet planted into place.

Chris did not know the reason she could not leave him. Of course, she loved the boy with all her heart as a mother should. But the other reason was known by the other two in the room with Raito. The blond man would never know nor would he ever understand it.

A mother's love would save Raito from the fate his father suffered.

"And what? You'd go back to _him_?" Chris spat.

Risa gritted her teeth. "I see why Raito never liked you if that's how you spoke to him when you were alone."

With that, the brunette spun her heel and carried all the food she had bought. She did not look back at him. Her eyes burned with anger. How did she not see that he was such a jerk? Damn her heartbreak for blinding her.

"Wait, _Risa_!"

"Too late, Chris. You won't touch my son and me again," Risa muttered, "I'll get Satoshi to enforce some kind of restraining order if you refuse."

As she walked away, she felt his longing gaze burn holes into her back. The brunette ignored this. She had other things to worry about.

* * *

Raito continued to rest. He did not awaken yet. There was something he had to do on his own. 

He had to fight that infection, the curse of the Hikari.

_Raito stood amidst the graves of his Hikari ancestors, staring at the most recent one. _

_Hikari Rio, his grandmother – the woman who cared for Raito's father until he was four years old. He never had the chance to meet her – all because of the contamination in their blood. That monster had murdered his grandmother in cold blood and laughed after he was done._

"_It is as White Wings says. You do look like my son." _

_Raito looked up at the tombstone. Sitting upon it was a woman. Her long hair was a darker shade of blue and curled around her face. The way her eyes were was like Raito's own. She was clothed in a white dress, free from any blood. There was a fragile smile on her almost pale face._

"_Grandmother Rio?" The boy asked._

_She nodded. "Yes, Raito. It is I. I see that you take mostly after my son, but have the stubbornness of your mother at times, ne?"_

_At her statement, Rio laughed. Nodding, Raito gave her a small smile, unsure of what to do. Before long, his grandmother's laughter halted when she looked at something past him. Rio's expression turned serious as she stepped down from her tombstone and wrapped her arms around the young boy. For a spirit, her body was quite warm._

"_He was about your age when your father first faced him. Do what your father could not. Remember that you are loved." _

_Rio's arms faded from around him. Raito spun around to see what she was talking about. Krad. He was there in this place. The son of Satoshi growled with anger. "You're not going to come out of me. You'll never see the light of the outside world ever again." _

_Krad crackled. His voice made shivers run up and down the young boy's spine. It frightened him for his father did not teach him how to defend against him. It wasn't Satoshi's fault. It wasn't Risa's fault. It wasn't even Raito's._

_It was Krad's._

"_You heard her." The bluenette boy whispered, "You heard Grandmother Rio! They love me. Otou-san and Okaa-san love me so leave me alone. You can't use me if you know that. You can't hurt me like you did to Otou-san!!"_

_Krad smirked. "Do you really think that will be able to stop me?"_

_Raito glared at him. He knew what he was thinking. The boy was so much like his father, save for one thing. For a brief moment, Raito's eyes changed. Instead of blue, they were brown – those brown eyes. Krad withdrew his breath._

"_Now those eyes of yours…look so much like hers." _

"_She is my mom and you can't hurt her or my dad." Raito retorted. In the boy's hand, a white feather materialized while a gentle hand was placed against his own. He looked over his shoulder and saw Shirube with dark, blank eyes._

"_You! Towa no-?"_

"_The Eternal Guide, I am not. I am just a Guide, Shirube." She replied, "I am Raito-sama's magical guardian and also the seal."_

_All color drained from Krad's angelic-looking face. "What seal?"_

"_Satoshi-sama's own creation." Raito heard his so-called guardian. Comprehending what was going on, the boy nodded and glanced between the feather and Krad. The magical weapon in his hand began to glow and he felt a surge of power rush through him into the feather. _

_In his eyes, he saw the symbol of the Hikari being draw with gold lines before Krad, who then appeared to be struggling with it, using powers of his own. Raito gritted his teeth. The devil in angel's clothing would not have his way. Not this time. Krad would not breach through to the surface. _

"_Repeat after me, Raito, while you think of the love of your mother." Shirube ordered. Raito nodded, concentrating on Krad's fighting image before them._

"_You, who are incomplete and seek nothing but your own, join half of your Koku Yoku. Thy tainted light must fade to the darkness whence you came. Thou shall never return to this place."_

_As he repeated these very words, a dizzy spell came over the boy. As he closed his eyes, the last thing he heard was Krad's dying gasps. _

* * *

"_Shirube_? Satoshi?" Risa called as she opened the door, where she saw _Shirube_ standing at the foot of Raito's bed. Satoshi, on the other hand, seemed to be praying for he was holding some kind of rosary in his hand. But it dawned to Risa that her ex-husband was not exactly a religious man and that a certain cross was a symbol of the Hikari. 

She drew her conclusion. They were aiding Raito.

Risa took a seat next to Satoshi, placing the bags of food quietly next to her. She did not want to disturb them for she knew the damage was great if you screwed up with magic. She sighed and waited.

She did not have to wait long.

A couple of minutes after she sat in silence, Satoshi shifted his weight and looked up. He turned and glanced at Risa, who smiled at him as he put away his little rosary in his pocket. "Where's Chris?"

"He left." Risa replied, "He never really liked Raito. You know, our little boy was just too damn smart for him."

Satoshi chuckled, standing up in time to see Raito open his eyes again. _Shirube_, however, did not return to normal right away. Her eyes were still empty, but she was still there. Noting this, Risa and Satoshi walked their son sit up and look straight at the artwork.

"Grandmother…you saw her?" The little boy asked.

"Yes, I did. It is a shame Risa-sama will never meet her in this life."

Satoshi froze. The expression on his face appeared quite pained, but this faded and he eventually smiled again.

* * *

"_Okaa-san_?" Raito suddenly asked as Satoshi stepped out of the room. Risa looked up from her romance novel and smiled at him. 

"What is it, sweetie?"

"Ano…_Otou-san_ asked me if we wanted to live with him after they let me out of here. Can we?" That was straight forward. Risa had blinked twice before turning to see Satoshi sitting outside the hospital room. She clutched her heart.

Perhaps, she did still love him after all. Her smile never left her face when she looked back at her son, his mirror image. "Why not? We'll be a family again, won't we? You'd like that, ne?"

Listening to this, _Shirube_'s grin went from ear-to-ear.

* * *

A few years later… 

As fate would have it, they moved in. They regained the family they had lost. Satoshi had proposed a second time and they married once again. The couple had never seen Raito any happier. He was always grinning since that day. He had never gained the reputation his father had gained during his school years though he had Satoshi's intellect.

Now at the age of fourteen, he was away for that annual school trip to the island. Raito would be gone for a while, but Krad would not surface either. _Shirube_, who was currently taking her nightly rest, had made sure of it those years before.

Since they were the only two left in the mansion, both Satoshi and Risa had a little idea. After sharing stories about their junior high years again, the bluenette cradled Risa in his arms, carrying her to them him. His wife was giggling. The diamond ring which was above the golden wedding band shone in the moonlight as she ran her fingers through his hair.

They knew what was coming next.

Before Risa knew it, she was lying down on their bed. She was smiling up at Satoshi, who was on top of her. His lips met hers for a passionate kiss. He nibbled a little on her lower lip and she softly moaned, allowing their tongues to slip into the other.

It wasn't very often when they got to do this since Raito was a bit older. These two seemed to take any opportunity they had.

That's a good thing, isn't it?

Because that's what they were supposed to be.

* * *

I didn't know how to properly end this so I apologize if the ending sucks like hell. I didn't want it to be all depressing since the first three chapters were depressing enough. And I didn't want Dana to almost cry again. 

Thanks for reading. I appreciate it.


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